It's Christmas for goodness sake ...

"Well I was wet, your side of the truck was dry,




I like dry,



that side didn't have your name on it,



so I am a bad boy...



it's Christmas ... go tell Santa or get over it !



Sheesh Murph !!!"

By Polar News

He was young and idealistic but RANDOLPH

thought there would be no discrimination just

because he was a Black tail and not a Rein deer.

Unfortunately he had not counted on local

animosity of the more famous deer who worked there

and was found crossing the north pole border unlawfully.

It was said he must have lost his way or gone back home

and no further investigation was launched though many years later

rumors surfaced that he was spotted in Santa's barbershop relaxing.

This could not be confirmed though because of the

security worries about lists compiled on humans stored there.

The tapes of all comments were lost some how by accidental erasure.

By Polar News Service ...

Wyatt the riot ...

My dog's name is Wyatt.




He's never too loud and mostly quiet.



He romps and plays on sunny days and even stormy weather.



He likes to chase anything that scats, especially if they look like cats or has a pretty feather.



But he does not know birdy fluff from cattail stuff and most times ends up looking pretty funny!

Dangerous thoughts

I can't help but to keep thinking of all the religious strife that covers this planet all in the name of the all mighty.
I wonder how anything in this little place can be of any more significancs
to that which is everything.
If one proton of one atom in my body has a billion solar systems in it's being and one place there less than a speck of sand has beings living on it and they are made up of the same thing as I or I am made up of it because the speck and the me are one thing, inseparable except by my casting it out but I am all things so when I cast it out there is no place but back in to me it must go to be mixed again in an ever-changing, roiling mass of energy as known by me but which is unknowable to the speck. The total is me yet the speck is me. I do not want to kill myself, I only want to let the speck change to my benifit. My purpose is only to be and the only battle should be against that opposite, not to be. Perhaps Shaky Spear had it more right than is given credit except to be or not to be is not the question, it is the answer.

Knocking

Weary of his circumstances as third crow on the fence, Friedrich decided to hitch a ride with the first eighteen wheeler and accommodating driver that came along with the hopes of gaining advantage by getting some windshield time while sitting on a dashboard, warm, refreshed and perhaps being the first on the scene for any squirrel mishap that he knew was common to such conveyances.......

Even if ...

Even if you are a speck of dust in the deepest, darkest reaches of space and time …

Even if no light shines form any knowable sun and all the points of light are so far away the universe looks like one dimly lit speck barely noticeable in a vast sea of blackness …

Even if the distance to anything like you is so far that time itself does not exist and seems void…You are not the forgotten edge of nothing …

But the leading edge of everything …

! …

Another round please ...

I just came inside after being outside looking in as I looked out ... The stars were beautiful and I wondered how far my soul will really go when I am done here ... I am not planning to leave any time soon but then you just never know ... It's a one way ticket you know ... Even if it all comes around again and again it gets tweaked each time with a butterfly sneezing a little differently each time and it's so vast the odds of it being the same twice are too much to behold except by the totality of itself ... but that doesn't stop me from looking out , not up but out to where my consciousness will expand one bright , sunny, rainy night as a new day dawns somewhere just before midnight and I am amazed I get to behold such wonders and know you in the same breath .

Have a wonderful new day and don't sweat the small stuff, just enjoy the good now because you can't keep it where we are going anyway!

The machine in summer clothing

Even as the brown leaves fall a still green machine prowls.

Edges of its coat showing the browns and yellows of the quiet time to come.

It’s prey already slowed and themselves hunting for a winter place.

The machine is patient and knows all come to those who watch and wait.

It’s deadly array of field artillery still sharp, its eye never closing untill the snow covers its hallow corps.

But sleek line and form for function keep it stealthy to the end and even in still summer clothing it steals the juices of life, not with contempt for the other but preservation of the self.

I looked but did I see ...

This very night I walked to my darkest place, eyes closed as if blind.

I know this spot , I have been there many times, alone.

This night I walked with two friends, a dog and me.

I was determined to see what I might find when I looked from my blind place, the one in the corner.

I walked slowly but sure-footed, listening for the trees, the rocks, all obstacles.

The other animal was sure of his path and thought none the less of me though he was wrong.

I was soon left alone to find what I came for.

No coyotes or deer rustled, no bird, no breeze disturbed my mind.

I tilted my face to a preconceived heaven then opened my eyes to see what I expected, points of light scattered and a feeling of being alone.

I closed my eyes, erased my mind, then looked again to see the face of God in narrow perspective.

I closed them once more to drain my head of such small thoughts and the vanity that I might know the almighty for I knew if it were the face only a thoughts worth could I really see.

Then I opened them again and let my soul see it's destiny.

He watches

There are many rocks but old man rock is the wisest of them all.

He watches with a steady gaze through sun and storms.

You may not notice him at first because he is very stealthy and it might seem he could never know anything .

But he is wise ! Old man rock is son of old man mountain and mother earth so he knows the importance of patience.

While he sits there watching and you think he can only know what his eyes tell him, you are wrong.

The wind brings him smells, he knows of the fire before your news person does and he has survived many of those himself so he knows how hot they can be.

He feels and tastes the rain to see if it is good enough for his brothers and sisters like racoon who he lets live in him and deer, fox and even old trickster coyote.

I myself have seen Coyote go many times and howl in old man rocks ear at night to tell him of a fine meal he has brought to share.

When men lay on him and block the sun his friend Ant chases them off then Mosquito makes sure man remembers his lesson near old man rocks drinking water.

He whistles in the wind and knows the world much deeper than you or I.

He feels the world around him and knows heavy weights on his soul.

He watches.

All rooms with a bath

There was a time, now gone by for most of us, when you shared a bathroom without a fuss ... And then one day along the way a landlord became magnanimous...
Now it seems so funny but think of the cost in money ...
An outhouse you know is cheap and dug when it's sunny.
To have the luxury of indoor plumbing at hand, not down the hall but in your room, how grand !
But some day you may come to rest in another land where sanitation is not the best and then you'll understand !
You'll forget the tailor and draper when out back you go to find alas there is no paper.
You will feel so sad, have to go in the woods like old Jake the trapper and you'll know just what you had.
That wonderful room with a crapper .

Dog Pond Dog

Dog gone that dog, that dog pond dog.
Wondered off again on an adventure to see.
Dog goned dog pond dog , he didn't take me !
Off he went on an adventure to roam, left me sitting here all alone at home.
I suppose it's my own darn fault, his tail was wagging, while my lower lip was dragging.
I could have gone, he asked me to.
I fussed about having to put on a shoe.
Dog gone that dog pond dog out on a run but if I hurry I might still have some fun!

Brewing fine ...

Brewing fine photos up in your brain is like viewing a train from two miles behind the caboose, it doesn't do any good unless you catch the train. First off there ain't no more cabooses on trains, they were all put out to pasture for electronic rear ends. Secondly if there were and you weren't on the train in the first place looking back (That's what photos are, looking into the past even if it is a shot of new technology ) so best be ready all the time for that shot and plan ahead to be where the action is but always look for the unplanned shot as well! SHOO SHOOT SHOOT
then shoot some more.

Pinstriper's ball or the Artfull Dodger

Phil Anthropuss was a pinstriper, he said, by trade .



He could do it all, eyes closed, one hand tied, was the boast that he made.



But someone threw him a curve, it was a baseball and he almost died.



For long pulls were his specialty, he cried, but before he was done he'd reach the other side !!!



The bystanders were loaded but so was his dagger, just the right amount of One Shot and swagger.



He took from his kit one more brush and a catcher's mitt.



Then with a swish so cunning and bright he floated the thing with a twist and a flip of delight.



A brush in one hand and the other in lip, his swaggered daggers flashed as ball fell from above, landing quit nicely in the palm of his glove.



The crowd milled round to see how he did, he moved his tip cup out while the ball he kept coyly hid.



As coins fully filled the money flagon he bowed when they moaned to see,



then produced the sphere he had so artfully played on, while beaming with glee.



But alas it was a mess, all goopy and wet, no line could be deciphered, it was a wreck and yet ...



He claimed the money put in his vase , stuck it in his pocket and scrammed from that place .

Never been there

New Hampshire, live free or die, great thought there though I have never been to New HampShire it must be beautiful and someone there liked HAP so what can I say but that I should make plans to travel there one day just to satisfy my wonder at such a place.
I have already started where I usually do , on line , to find out more about this cool place (they say it really is cool, freezing in fact at certain times of the year I suppose)And I know what a shire is , before the Normans conquered England with words at least it was like a county or governed area and New of course is opposed to old so there must be an Old Hamp Shire somewhere. But Hamp is stumping me !
I know it is not the US governments home stability thing, that wasn't invented when New got it's name, Perhaps it was for Ham, a county where a lot of pigs came from or Hampton, a local potentate who's subjects loved and they just shortened it so it sounded better during the revolution sort of like Pennsylvania Dutch if you were German during WWII or something or maybe they grew Hemp, the other suggestion from Google, during the revolution and like many other "American" words it got twisted to sound more USAish.
Well no matter how it came about I think I'm going to love the place with beautiful fall colors and scenic byways and old churches and minus 11 deg. temps in the north and balmy + 7 deg in it's south during the winter. Well perhaps I might visit south New Mexico during the winter, it's New too and I know what Mexico means ... or do I?

Photography tips 101

There have been many books, blogs and how toes written on what you need to do to take great photographs. Some on the functions of every camera ever made I suppose as well.

Here is my take on how to take great shots …

1) Only listen the experts if what they are telling and showing you is what you like !

2) Look at everything, every day and not just from afar, get right down , out or over there to investigate it in detail !

3) protect your camera from damage even at your own peril .

4) And this is the most important one of all … NEVER GROW UP !!!!!!!!!!

How I became a friend

When we were young many things they said could be done.
All you have to do is believe, focus and all would come.
I was a trusting soul and thought this would be great.
I started early believing I would be a fireman at the age of eight.
By nine though I found there were other rules then even more when I started searching in schools.
It seems that no matter how hard I tried for the hook and ladder
there were others who dreamed as well and into their trap I fell.
I never became that fellow in red with hose in hand but a hundred other things instead.
I was a trucker and Tailor, a carpenter and jailer, a farmer and biker, a ranger and hiker, a person of hats too many to mention with more to come I'm sure.
So if it is true that what ever I will may come true then I still think I want to be a friend to you for that is the best thing I wanted to do!

Spoons

You've heard all the things like a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, Lovin’ spoon full and a spoon in hand is worth … well maybe that one is a little obscure but the point is a spoon full of sugar can make a diabetic of you if the thought is ingrained on a young brain, trusting all things their parents tell then and glued to that all knowing nanny , the TV, that most parents attach children to “So they can learn” and so the parent doesn't have to pay attention to them and actually teach them that the sugar is probably worse in the long run than the illness the meds are supposed to cure them of , shame on Disney, and as lovely as the thought of a spoon full of love is it is also probably bad for you if that’s all you get out of a relationship. But the wonderful spoon, invented by no modern person knows who, is still the best utensil on the table. You can spread peanut butter with either end , dig out the last of the jelly in the jar, in a pinch you can even sharpen one edge and cut meat , a good heavy one will crack nuts or noggins to knuckles , no fork can get the soup picked up without the aid of bread but the spoon can get it all. The only thing is spaghetti is tough but then it can play a part when the fork twirls the strings as a backstop or if you are smart you can use your spoon to cut it up into small spoonsized lengths and dig in.

I love my spoon !

Fair is fare ...

She watched him day and night with teeth brightly shining.
Anyone could tell how she felt but he never looked her way. He only rocked to and fro as if in some ancient ritual trance, never knowing what he could have had.
She only hoped that when they packed to leave some mistake by a roady could bring them closer together.

Mumblety peg

You can be someone who goes through life making a jack-knife stick blade first into the dirt only to dull the point …
Or you can be the blade that uses the dirt to create life and makes it’s own sharp point !

Sense of humor ...

This picture is more at the stem of the phrase "having a Sense of humor".

A reason we have one and how to use it ...
Though it is a very common misspelling "Sense" of humor has two other variants that will give you a better understanding why it is so important !
The real word is "Scents" of humor and applies to how good you are at sniffing out jerks and nare-do-wells who plague the world of us more likable characters ( you and me of course have no scent, well no bad scent at least , only great armpit odor in my case ) so only those with exceptional Scents of humor are smelled by others and thus carry us through the day with the knowledge that someone will pick up the tab sooner or later if we himm and haw enough as we fumble through our wallets and BINGO a good time is had by all making our friends happy by helping us out and us happy by getting a free lunch.
The other spelling of the word is " Cents" of humor and this ties in with the aforementioned story as you might expect. To be truly happy you can't be bothered with carrying around all that heavy paper money or plastic cards for gosh sakes ! So just a few cents will be enough for the judge at your trial to think you are indigent and give you glorious tribulations ... err tribute for having such scents of humor.
See ? just a matter of semantics (some times known as significs).

Simply you

The cosmos is full of stars that are thousands of times as bright as ours
but we can not see a penny on the ground at night by their light ...
yet it takes no light at all for me to see your face, It is always with me.

What's the point ?

"What's the point ?" you ask ... "it's been there for many years and no one goes there anyway." But birds go there and deer, bear, cougars, coyotes, foxes, mice, and a million other of the creatures go there. Some times we loose sight that the world has other living things other than humans who , if we went there, would surely soon be eaten, or beaten into submission and soon would not be anywhere and what a sad day that would be to have all the freeways we wanted, all the coal, all the air but only see concrete and other humans.

Oh Osprey

So silent on the air that nothing would give you away if only you could hold the excitement in.
The sweep of wing ready for a knife edged plunge into cold waters, the prize , a fish to win.
No sound in deaf waters splash the rainbow hear.
It is only in a shadow they fear.
But real enough the Ospreys cry , IEEE IEEE IEEE
Oh looky here , a fish to fry.
Eagle eye looks as talon rakes, tough as U.S. steel.
Searching depths for a fishy feel.

Happy Sun's day ...

Sun's day and the sun is out here on this lazy , yup I actually slept in, day in sunny southern Ore-E-gun.
I hope it's shining where ever you are as well and you have time to look around your normal life to something beyond.

If I may suggest ... take a cup or better yet thermos ( it will last longer and make you stay away from normal routine a few minutes or hours more) of warm liquid of your choice , step out your back door and immediately look down and to the right, notice anything and everything even to the smallest cracks you can see. If you have a camera try to photograph it as close as you can. Don't spend a lot of time there but move on for at least two blocks and keep an eye out to the right and low for anything that you have not noticed before and investigate it closely. Move on again and wander for at least ten minutes looking down and to the right. You may be amazed at what you have been walking or driving past all this time. Don't be in a hurry to get back either but on the return trip keep looking down and to the right because this will show you the other side of things on your path to discovery.

OH yes if you do not have a camera take a drawing paper folded in 4s to sketch the interesting stuff, don't worry if you think you can not draw, the sketches are not for the world to see unless you want them to, they are for you and to bring back the memories of the walk.

An aside... I have found that taking a child under 4 years old can be a fun experience because they have better low vision and find many more interesting things than you will and if you do, make sure to wear some grubby loose clothes so you can get down and investigate with them as you move along. They are quite happy to have you down there and get very into little details but don't be too squeamish as they may pick up slugs, old candy, twigs and lord knows what else.

Happy Sun's day !
Hap

And God sent an angel

In a place of no clocks or maps an angel of death hovers over the earth, it's shadow a harbinger to many, only of hopeful interest to those who scavenge the souls remains if they can and unnoticed by those not affected in the larger realms of existence though they two are stalked by their own savage death agents. Yet all, on warm days, may know the warmth of Gods graces.
The angel strikes with little warning but does not always take.
The threat is ever known by all but the urge for life is strong and more come to bolster the angels potential gifts to God.

The Archer

The archer was small but very good at his chosen field. His eye the eye of Eagle or Hawk.
His mind, sound but for a few thoughts of how it all fit together. You see he was not at all that sure that what he saw was all there was.
He pondered many evenings on what reality really could be and decided it could be anything he really believed.
This act brought him many tribulations amongst the nonbelievers but he did not see their wrath at his door for in his world they did not exist.

The loud Zen Master ...

Rust and happiness

Once there was a truck who was old and more than rusted …
Though it still felt strong, with a heart that could still be trusted …
It longed for some crazy youth to fill it with laughter, to push it to the limit …
And a youth did come but sad it was with half a will just was not in it …
The kid it seemed had other dreams and it was just too much to finish …
So the truck sat with dimming hope and cancer forming where metal was needed to replenish …
But then one day an old fellow spied her …
And hopped right inside her …
With a smile a mile wide asked … hey kid how much ya want … and such …
The kid looked at him, for that old bucket I’ll take what ya got and from the looks that ain’t much ! …
The old man bought the truck with all he had then went scouting …
A wheel here, a bargain there and soon you could hear him shouting …
One last touch was to paint the eye of Von Dutch …
That and a little tweek to the clutch …
You and me, we are fine old antiques, we fit like hand and glove …
And off they went, the Chevy and man and all it took was a little love !

This hand ...

This hand I have watched grow, place seed and sew never resting long, reaching
always with it's twin, to the soil and sky both apart and at the same time.
I have seen it learn with passion and teach with the tenderness of an ancient mind
who knows the value of gentle pushes and when to shove.
This hand will guide others to do great things, hurt from a life times worth of toil, clasp a younger one in a warm embrace as well as an aged one as light fails.
This hand will always care.

Blind eye knowing

I



Walk



but



not



arrive,



I



Meditate,



quiet,



The



plum



falls



within



me

Intricate

A delicate balance of dark taken from night to bathe the light of love from it's blinding self and passion flirts with immortality in an intricate dance of eternity.

Breezy

In days when sail was the latest technology, square was in and speed was easy ...
calm days were crashes where grown men cried to heaven "please make it breezy ...
A Beagle was a ship that sailed new places, wide and far in ...
seas with breezes carried searchers like Darwin ...
Life was hard up in the yard but horizons were searched ..
By sailors in a crow's nests perched.

YOU

REFRIGERATORS AND REDNECK ROUSTABOUTS, ROUGE ROASTED TO PERFECTION, MASTERFULLY MIXED, FUZZY PARTS NIXED, HAZINESS FIXED ON THE EXTREME WITH GLASSES OF CLASSES AND CLASSES OF GLASSES, SOME PUDGY OTHERS FUDGY SMUDGY, BLUES DRIFTING BEYOND THE DREAMY, FLIRTING WITH STEAMY AND INTO CREAMY, ALL SMOOCHED AND GOOSED AND PUSHED THROUGH THE FILTER OF MY INNER EAR, DRIBBLED WITH BEER I HAVE NO FEAR AND NOTHING TO COME BACK FOR EXCEPT YOU.

Cheata

I think this drawing reflects the theme of instinct in that a cat of this caliber is instinctively all about speed ...



Oh Cheetah if you only could drive as fast as you would ...
Chasing Hyenas would be fun til they lay exhausted in the sun ...
You, without even tryin' would dust any larger lion ...
And it would be nothing to pass, unless of course you ran out of gas.

Squeezy cheese and drive by slippers

Times have gotten stranger than drive by slippers,
Gets any worse and we'll all be growing flippers ...

It could be worse though, of course,
we could look and never find the culprits and an origin of the source ...

Like the rainbows end with no pot-o-gold,
The leprechauns got there first and the cheeky lil beggars were very, very bold ...

They stold the pot with guile and ease
then cooked up a batch of squeezy cheese ...

They cried and moaned they had no money
while all the time sucking sweet, sweet honey ...

But like to the Chauns we'll have to pay I'm sure
though all we'll ever see is a slippery stinking pile of manure ...

Mermaids in love ...

Mermaids and love ... there certainly seems to be a lot of that going round or at least a lot of women say they love them and I hear sailors tales a lot but you know how sailors are and tall tails err tales that is.
I am not sure you can make love with one or even to one, in a mortal human way at least.
You could BE in love with one and perhaps even have the love returned but they are decendants of chickens and lay eggs. I have seen this actually.
They do it like trout by digging holes (nests) in the beach sand under water and plopping a few eggs in then try to lure a mermen over to fertalize them but there is no physical smooching and stuff , too much sea slime on their lips ! Yukky patooey !!!!
They do occasionally get a submerged surfer or two but when the mermaids try to squeeze the fertilizing juice out of them the surfers don't make it to the surface and become secondary food sorce for crabs ( You have to watch out for crabs when your with a mermaid or mermen ya know )
So I suppose " You can't can't make love to them unless you have an aqua-lung and like slimey kisses , but after she squeezes the juice out of you you won't be telling anyone how it was anyway "

Hap

In Hock to our necks but ...

In the beginning I was created from some local riff raff God had floating around after he did a number on whales and kumquats, he had already created the first two so he had time on his hands and I was the guinea pig.

But then he put an extra helping of beluga bladder in me so I look pretty much like I do today and it gave him this great Idea for a Pot Bellied Terraductape. We were playing a tough game of darts at the time and he asked me what I thought.

"Well", I told him, "the form is great but the name you could tear apart and use later for more things" and that he should economise a little so I, with my new found freedom, could create banks, congressional offices and gas stations for some of his other scrap people he was thinking of building out of waste materials.

So he asked what I thought a good name might be for this new animal that would rule his world for a while. I thought for .0032 seconds (which is actually a long time up there I might add) and came up with ... you guessed it Dynamos but he nixed that thinking he might want an electric grid or a rock band on this planet and went with Dinosaurs instead. I had to agree, it was great logic because there ain't nutin' else he was going to make from those letters.

We went on to playing chess and he won of course but for my loss made me be born in the 1900s for my cheekiness.

John's dog is a happy pup though some times his ears are pinned back low.
John loves his pet, they romp and bite as they frolic in the snow.
John laughs at pup for trying to slip away.
Pup loves the boy but wishes he could teach John to "STAY !"

Speed Kills

There are times when nothing happens or at least it appears that way but all the while we are moving at speeds much more unfathomable than science knows.
While you are sitting there meditating your inner peace, being still within, there are cosmic collisions that dwarf any supernova ever seen and they won't be seen for another hundred thousand billion years though they happen while you breath deeply the universe of your known self and even the self is debatable for if the cosmos is one thing, you are a part of more than a grand illusion, you are pure thought.
To say slow down is easy, to do it is imposable except within a very tiny sphere so remember ...
Speed kills ...

The secret